We’re spending a lot of time together lately. A lot.
With me on my summer break and Brian working from home a great deal of the time, we are together a lot. We often have two, sometimes three meals together a day. It’s a lot of togetherness. And you know what it has made me realize?
Brian is my best friend.
Really. Brian is my closest, dearest, most favorite friend. And I love spending time with him. We talk or sit in silence, read our own books or watch a show together, study the Bible together, run errands– and in all of it I realize over and over how much I enjoy him.
I’m reading ‘Real Marriage’ by Mark and Grace Driscoll right now, and I’m sure I’ll post a review when I’m done, but the very first thing they talk about is the necessity of friendship in marriage.
We respect each other and genuinely like spending time together. We know each other’s likes and dislikes– Brian likes sweets late at night and Lindsey likes to eat breakfast right when she wakes up. Brian does not like a post-it note to-do list and Lindsey does not like hearing the person next to her chew their food. Brian is versed in my personality quirks (the myriad of them) and I am versed in Brian’s dreams for the future.
Knowing these things about each other, trusting each other, and just generally liking the other person make us stronger as a couple. It may sound obvious to say that you should be friends with your spouse, but many couples lose sight of the friendship, let it go by the wayside, or do not take steps to cultivate it. Right now, I’m daily blessed by my best friend and the chance to hang out with him and get to know him better. I can’t help but think that the time we’re putting in now is helping to build the foundation we want for the years to come.
Let’s face it– in 50 years when the looks have gone, the bodies are wrinkly, and the kids have left the house, B and I will spend hours rocking back and forth on the front porch. When that day comes, I want sip my lemonade, adjust my dentures, and rock next to my very best friend.