A point of contention

This blog is, many times, a point of contention. Are you blogging tonight? No, I blogged the past three nights. That’s not true, I blogged on…

As if newlyweds needed anything else to try to figure out in their first year.

But on Sunday, when Brian and I wished each other a Happy 11 Months, the first thing out of his mouth following that was, “One more month of the blog!”

It’s been good to write. And it’s actually been a good thing to have something force you to write. But writing EVERY day— that’s been a challenge. And with the crazy schedules we talk about all the time on here, it’s been even more of one. I won’t lie– there have been fights that started from a conversation about the blog. I don’t think they were ever explicitly about the blog, but nevertheless, mentioning the blog in this house can cause some real tension.

But I know I’ll miss it. I already told Brian that I want to have my own blog for teaching and crafting and vintage adventures. He suggested that I do that on here, though I don’t think this is the right place for that. This is the place we chronicled the first entire year of man and wife, not the place for my next Pinterest project. (Though, on a side note, we made some delicious low-fat chicken taco chili from a Pinterest pin on Monday– awesome!)

It will be nice, though, not to have to check my phone first thing in the morning when it was Brian’s night to do the blog and he hadn’t gotten to it when I went to bed, just to make sure he posted. I will be nice to not be constantly keeping a mental note of how many times I have posted in a given week to use as leverage, or to have expectations for my spouse to volunteer to post– expectations that I never verbalized but undoubtedly got upset with him for failing to meet. It will be nice.

Less than a month now. I think we can handle that. Thanks for hanging with us for the past 11 months ūüôā

An interesting point of conflict

After eight months we have discovered an interesting point of conflict, blog posts. Specifically, who is posting on the long, tiring, or boring days.

Don’t get me wrong, we¬†genuinely¬†like posting here. It gives us a great chance to reflect on what’s going on, to think about our days and our interactions. Overall, this has been a great experience so far.

But, the newness has worn off and our busy schedules are taking their toll. Multiple times in the last week we have had some version of the following conversation:

“Are you going to post today?”

“I don’t know, do you want to?”

“I can.”

“Okay.” Pause. “Are you sure?”

“I guess.”

Not exactly leaping at the opportunity, huh?¬†To be fair we both do this, and¬†I suppose it’s normal. We have not missed a day since we got married, and frankly our life isn’t all that exciting every single day. There are some days when the ideas are hard to come by.

All that said, more often than not we really do enjoy this, and we are glad you all take the time to follow our little project. A constant topic of conversation in our house is the other person’s posts. We find insight that we would not have gotten any other way, or we get to see a situation¬†through¬†the other person’s eyes. In the end, this has been a fantastic thing for our marriage.

Even though there are specific days when I may not have a good topic, or I’m too tired to sit down a write a quality post, I still enjoy this. Honestly, I’m still looking forward to writing and reading this blog for the next three and a half months. Even the boring days.

I bet you expected more fights

I bet you expected more fights to be written about on this blog.

It’s okay, this is a safe place. You can admit it. I bet you initially had a reality TV-like desire to see the rough parts of how two naive youngsters (or at least one youngster and a rapidly-becoming-middle-aged guy) would handle the conflicts of a brand new marriage. Really? You can’t cop to it?

It’s okay, I understand. <wink>

I had a conversation with a coworker today about the blog. She asked me how it was going and I told her it was going really well. She asked if we have blogged any really interesting fights. I told her no, but only because there have not really been any.

Sure, we have had some tense moments, and Lindsey almost threw me off a boat. We blogged those, but that has been about it. No knock-down drag-outs, no major blowups. I know, it’s disappointing.

But the more I thought about it I told my colleague that I think it is partially because of the blog that we have not had those fights. Because we talk about what we post about and because we are really open about what we want to write about our communication is really good right now. Generally we both read each post before it goes up, and conversations and discussion do ensue. I learn a lot about her from those talks, and I bet she does too.

I don’t think you have to start a blog to communicate well, but I do think¬†checking¬†in with your¬†spouse¬†daily about life, you day and the marriage– and being honest about it all– is vital. This blog keeps our communication open, timely, and clear. I think all marriages need that.

Welcome To Our Little Experiment

Welcome to our new little corner of the Internet. It’s a cozy newlyweds’ hangout where we hope to share our lives and our thoughts on marriage as we walk together through our first year. Hopefully it’s funny, interesting and good way to see how we grow– if not at least all of you who have been here before can laugh at the mistakes you remember making.

Everyone has told us the first year of marriage is great, or tough, or fun, or long, or short, and much more. We believe them. All of them. This blog is an invitation for you to join us and see exactly how much of it is true as we blog every day of the first year of our marriage.

Yep, you read that right. We’re going to post every day. We heard of another couple doing this, a blogger that Brian follows, and we thought it was a great idea. So, on this site we will document the full first year of our marriage.

We’re sure that most of our readers will be family and friends that see the blog mentioned at our wedding and decide to check in on us now and then. To those folks, thank you for the support and love, and let’s hope we can make this exciting for you. Of course, if we are lucky some of you may have no clue of who we are, and that will validate our writing. So for you, our wonderful, appreciated, and voyeuristic mystery guest here is an introduction.

Lindsey is a 6th grade English teacher near Austin. She‚Äôs an English major, a world traveler, avid reader, former missionary and music snob. She‚Äôs crafty (as in crafts, not as in sly) and loves hunting for the next, great vintage find. As a Longhorn alum she wasn‚Äôt sold on football, but as the future wife of a diehard OSU Cowboy she is learning to like it. ūüôā

Brian is a Program Manager for one of the big boys in the IT world. He has been working hard for the man for the last 10 years since he graduated from Oklahoma State University. He loves his OSU Cowboys, good beer, an evening with a book on theology, and a video game now and then. He is feverishly working to convert his future wife to being a Cowboy fan; so far bribery with new orange clothes has been the most effective method.

The goal for our marriage is to show the glory of our Lord, and ultimately we want to see the same thing happen through this blog. Hopefully we can shed some light on marriage, sin, grace, and maybe some embarrassing and funny moments along the way. We trust the Lord with our marriage, and trust that He can use our meager talents and humble lives for His kingdom.

If you want to follow us through this year easily, there is an abundance¬†of ways to do so. The best option is to subscribe our posts through our¬†RSS feed¬†using an RSS reader (don’t know what this is? Go here. If you are looking for a reader, we suggest using Google’s), You can also subscribe via email through a link on our front page, follow us on Twitter, or you can ‘like’ our Facebook page and see our updates from there. So really, you have no excuse, unless you just don’t like us. ūüėČ

So, welcome, friend. Grab a cup of coffee and settle in to find out what lies ahead for you when you’re married… or, laugh at our mistakes as you remember making them too.