Retreat

This weekend was a good one, mainly for what I learned. I was away at our church’s Men’s Retreat, and I walked away with some great perspectives.

First and foremost, I realized that in 8 months Lindsey and I have truly become one in a way that is hard to understand. I had a great time hanging out with guys I respect and love to be around, but I could not get her out of my head. In the past this is exactly the type of weekend I would have forgot everything and lost myself in the experience and friendship. But now I have a distinct sense of oneness with this woman that won’t let me. And that is a wonderful thing.

Second, I was reminded how blessed I really am to be in the Men’s Development Program with the group I have. I am growing to respect and love these men. I am learning how to be honest, confess my junk, and ask for help. Even better, these guys point me in the right direction every time. It’s a such a good thing, I can’t even describe it fully.

There is more, of course. I was reminded of how great it is to hear Edgar Allan Poe at night in the woods. I realized that I forgot how nice a walk down a county road at night can be. There’s more, but I doubt you would find it as meaningful as I did, so I will leave it there.

The thing that I will walk away with is this, and I would advise any married man of this fact too: we need to love our wives first and best– but one of the best ways to do so is to have strong, committed friends beside you. Their help, insight, commiseration and wisdom is invaluable, and should be treated as such. You need those guys at your side, because a foxhole can be a very lonely place.

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Attention: Men and women are different!

I know, you’re not shocked at all. It really isn’t a surprise, but it keeps getting reinforced in my mind.

Last night and this morning Lindsey went to a slumber party/retreat to kick off her Women’s Development Program. They played games, stayed up late, and spent a lot of time getting to know each other. It sounds like her group is well on their way to forging deep connections.

On the other hand, last night I went to the kickoff for the Men’s program. We grilled steaks, had some drinks, talked and hung for three hours and too our leave. We had some great conversations, and actually learned a lot about each others’ backgrounds, but it was nowhere near as deep, or long, as the women.

I’m not sure there is any deep significance to this beyond my lame title above. Men and women are wired very differently, and it is a good thing for me to keep in mind in relating to Lindsey.